soil conditions or opportunity?...

In beginning my garden this year, we had much prep work to do... this house when we bought it last year had a yard full of weeds. I kid you not, up to my thigh. Bindweed, Morning Glory, and Dandylions, to name only a few. On a .41 acre lot... that's indeed a lot of weeds.

Anyway, after all the yard work last year, planting trees, shrubs, installing the new sprinkler system, and no lawn, the warming temps of spring have brought to life the weeds that have long been dead and burried. The seeds left over from last year are finding their way out of hiding and emerging into bloom... EVERYWHERE.

I assumed our soil was quite awful, as the previous owners of this house had done nothing to maintain it's health... I mean, nothing pretty was alive, just weeds, and weeds don't need a thing to grow as it seems.

It has me reflecting on where the weed seeds are planted in the soil of my own heart or life, that only take a moment or two of sunlight or a drop or two of rain (aka: opportunity) to sprout? Some brief seedlings I suspect stay hidden until the opportunity are: doubts in God, doubts in myself and God's unique purposes in me, bitterness towards others/unforgiveness, complacency... etc. etc. etc. How often do we know the seed is there? I'd imagine that it's not until we see it emerge and sprout that we will acknowledge it's existance. Afterall, out of sight is so easily translated into out of mind. haha.

The soil is fertile enough for weeds to grow... only thing needed are favorable conditions and opportunity, right?

Thankfully for the weeds in my yard I'm armed with a spray that promises to kill all the way to the roots.

Time for some inner reflection of where I am harboring seeds within the soil of my heart... or worse where the seeds have sprouted and sent roots down to the abyss for longevity.

++God... search me again and again and know my ways, watch the soil of my heart for where you and I can tend it together and maintain it's health. Plant crops and crops within me of your very love and mercy so that I may grow the fruit of the Spirit. Search my heart, show me, grow me, and lead me in Your ways, Your truth, and in Your love. Thank you Father... in Jesus' name... amen.++

interrupting...

My little boy today said the most brilliant thing.....

Alec: "Mommy?"
Me: "Yes, honey?"
Alec: "We should listen to God!" "Right?" as if to make sure I agreed with his thought...
Me: "Yes, we should... He's talking to us all the time..." I'm lovin' Alec's observation and his heart to remember this all... when he breaks in with the most brilliant reminder...
Alec: "Yep, He is... but sometimes we interrupt Him."

so so true...
so so true...

++God... thank you for still speaking to me even though I interrupt you constantly with my own insignificant questions, ideas, and complaints. Please grow me into an adult who can stay tuned into your Voice and your whispers into my life... I'm desperate to grow out of this phase of seemingly short attention spans to what you're trying to teach me, and where you might be trying to lead me deeper. Thank you Father... thank you... again and again.++

being here...

Being in the present is something I've been working on as of late. I find I'm regularly asking myself "Am I in the here and now?" and depending on the answer, I usually have to shift some priorities and retrain my thoughts so that I am. I have missed some things over the last few years, because I am off somewhere else in my mind. When I'm with my children, I sometimes am a world away in my mind... I'm off on a journey inside my heart digging with a spade to see what's under this layer, or I'm trying to wade through the fog that has settled on this other expanse of my heart, WHILE I'm trying to be a mom... doing the mom things, making lunch, listening to their stories, and WHILE I'm answering their questions about life. How can I be somewhere else, WHILE I'm being asked to be present? Why the distance between the here and now, to the place that I can get lost in (my thoughts). Being present is a truely awe inspiring thing... as I learn to do it more and more, I find myself awaken to my senses being more stimulated than I realized was possible. The birds chirp louder, the kids laugh is more infectious, and the sting of saddness for what I've lost to the times I've failed to be in the here and now, more painful.

Interesting it is...

the here and now...

in today...

if I journey away from it and into somewhere else and into the caverns of my mind and heart... I sense I'm missing so much of what God is revealing to me.

I wonder if I don't have to really dig to figure stuff out, but that the more I am present in the here and now, in the present reality, then, THEN, the figuring out of stuff with just unfold in it's own sweet time.

Here and now...

here and now...

I'm in the here and now...