So, I'm at a point where I'm contemplative over can I express again? Can I do it without caring what my voice sounds like to others ears, and instead just center on what it feels like to hear my thoughts while resting in my own skin? I like being free to say and feel and think out loud... but I remember the regret to of commiting to something, even if it is as little as writing it down somewhere, where it becomes visually permanent. Logging a thought into permanence, even though two minutes from now I move on and change and shift... how can I live comfortably knowing that at one point and time I thought out words and expression of something that I afterwards and in another season, I will feel differently from, and moved on from. How can journaling the thought and the progression away from it, or deeper beyond it, coexist? I know they can, and they do inside me all day every day... but somehow the journaling of it, makes it more concrete, where as at least with my mind, I find that they fade away into the vast chasm of me. Somehow that's more humane than leaving them sitting out there in a cyber journal to collect with other older thoughts that were moved on from.
hmmm... do I have a lot to say? Do I even like Blogger? Is this where I want to say whatever it is I say? Does it matter? I'm not sure... maybe I just need to first focus on what the whispers are saying and if I can hear them.
I hope that once I listen to them a bit more, they'll rise in their decibel so I don't have to strain and focus so hard to hear them.
This world is not all about me... I am so thankful for that.
4 comments:
Monica,
I blog two different ways. The first way is for me; in that I sound off some of what is inside of my head in my more serious posts. I am very glad for the outlet, and most of the time, I don't really care what other people think.
The second way I blog is with humor,such as the tips of the day. I am somewhat goofy in the head most of the time, and so I want to share that with people, and I do hope that sometimes, it brings a smile to their face, or a laugh, or just causes them to say, "Huh?!"
I never used to blog humor regularly before, but now that I at least attempt to, I find myself enjoying blogging far more than ever.
Be yourself, and be brave enough not to care what other people think; that's the best advice I can you, if you want it. For the record, I always enjoyed reading you, because I enjoyed knowing you.
"be yourself and be brave..."
hmm... myself. I wonder about that... who is this "myself" gal... I shall look for her. :)
Thank you for your encouragement... you've always been a safe feeling friend to have around :)
"I like being free to say and feel and think out loud."
Me too but sometimes I feel pressed to justify what I say and feel by those who feel differently and I can't do that. I am just me as God inside of me has shaped me. I need no justification but if I do I trust that my Lord provided for it.
May you make many new friends through blogging as I have....and may I be one of them.
I'm looking forward to getting to know you, Monica. Maybe we can encourage each other.
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